1 00:00:07,260 --> 00:00:09,390 - PREVIOUSLY ON CALIFORNICATION... 2 00:00:09,430 --> 00:00:12,200 KAREN, I CAME BACK... FOR YOU. 3 00:00:12,230 --> 00:00:13,460 - OH. 4 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,830 - ATTICUS JUST FIRED ME. - BUMMER. 5 00:00:15,870 --> 00:00:18,340 - BUT NOT BEFORE HE FIRED YOU TOO. 6 00:00:18,370 --> 00:00:19,640 - I NEED TO PRESENT MYSELF TO KAREN 7 00:00:19,670 --> 00:00:21,270 AS AN ADULT MALE WITH A JOB. 8 00:00:21,310 --> 00:00:24,070 - YOU MUST BE HANK. - HENRY JAMES MOODY I. 9 00:00:24,110 --> 00:00:25,840 - RICK RATH. CALL ME RATH. 10 00:00:25,880 --> 00:00:27,680 THE LAST THING I NEED AROUND HERE IS SOME SNOTTY, 11 00:00:27,710 --> 00:00:30,110 PRETENTIOUS FUCK WHO'S GONNA LOOK DOWN ON TELEVISION. 12 00:00:30,150 --> 00:00:31,780 - I'M TRYING TO GROW THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE 13 00:00:31,820 --> 00:00:33,680 BEFORE IT'S TOO FUCKING LATE, 14 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:35,690 AND IT ALL STARTS WITH ME GETTING A JOB. 15 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:37,590 - ARE YOU SURE YOU CAN ACTUALLY HANDLE A JOB? 16 00:00:37,620 --> 00:00:40,090 - HEY, DID YOU MANAGE TO GET IT UP LAST NIGHT? 17 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:41,560 - I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. 18 00:00:41,590 --> 00:00:43,390 - YOU'RE HANK MOODY. - WHO WOULD YOU BE? 19 00:00:43,430 --> 00:00:44,790 - THIS WOULD BE LEVON. 20 00:00:44,830 --> 00:00:46,430 HE'S THE KID I'VE BEEN TELLING YOU ABOUT. 21 00:00:46,460 --> 00:00:48,430 HE WANTS TO INTERVIEW YOU FOR HIS COLLEGE NEWSPAPER. 22 00:00:48,470 --> 00:00:49,570 - DO YOU HAVE ANY CHILDREN? 23 00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:51,600 - YEAH, ONE, A DAUGHTER. 24 00:00:51,640 --> 00:00:53,170 - YOU FUCKED MY MOM. 25 00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:55,410 - REALLY? YOU'RE NOT FUCKING WITH ME? 26 00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:57,270 WHEN DID THIS OCCUR? 27 00:00:57,310 --> 00:01:00,310 - I GUESS ABOUT NINE MONTHS BEFORE I WAS BORN. 28 00:01:07,780 --> 00:01:10,190 - [gasps] YAY! IT'S A MURSE! 29 00:01:10,220 --> 00:01:12,490 MY VERY OWN MURSE! HOW DID YOU KNOW? 30 00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:14,260 - STOP IT. 31 00:01:14,290 --> 00:01:17,590 IT'S FOR ALL YOUR WRITERLY [French accent] ACCOUTREMENT. 32 00:01:17,630 --> 00:01:19,860 I THOUGHT IT WAS VERY ROCK AND ROLL. 33 00:01:19,900 --> 00:01:20,930 - TOTALLY. 34 00:01:20,960 --> 00:01:23,170 AND YET, IT SENDS A VERY STRONG AND CLEAR MESSAGE 35 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:24,230 TO MY CO-WORKERS 36 00:01:24,270 --> 00:01:26,440 THAT THIS DUDE COULD ROCK OUT WITH HIS COCK OUT. 37 00:01:26,470 --> 00:01:27,700 BUT WHEN HE'S DONE, 38 00:01:27,740 --> 00:01:29,510 HE CAN TUCK IT AWAY AND GET DOWN TO BIZ. 39 00:01:29,540 --> 00:01:32,480 - MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY. - MM-HMM. 40 00:01:32,510 --> 00:01:34,180 - WEAR IT WELL ON YOUR FIRST DAY. 41 00:01:34,210 --> 00:01:37,180 - I SHALL, MY LOVE. THANK YOU SO MUCH. 42 00:01:39,580 --> 00:01:41,220 - I'M VERY PROUD OF YOU. 43 00:01:41,250 --> 00:01:43,590 - WHY? 'CAUSE I GOT A STINKIN' JOB? 44 00:01:43,620 --> 00:01:44,850 IF I'D KNOWN IT WAS THIS EASY 45 00:01:44,890 --> 00:01:46,490 TO MAKE YOUR BOSOM SWELLETH WITH PRIDE, 46 00:01:46,520 --> 00:01:49,330 I WOULD HAVE APPLIED FOR A JOB AT STARBUCKS LONG AGO. 47 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:52,360 BARISTA. - NO, IT'S NOT JUST THE JOB. 48 00:01:52,400 --> 00:01:55,270 YOU'RE FINALLY READY TO EMBRACE CHANGE, I THINK. 49 00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:58,470 - WELL, THE TIMES, THEY ARE A-CHANGING, 50 00:01:58,500 --> 00:02:00,370 WHETHER I LIKES IT OR NOT. 51 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:03,770 - AND CHANGE IS... 52 00:02:03,810 --> 00:02:06,680 SEXY. - YOU DON'T SAY? 53 00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:08,550 - I DO. - REALLY? 54 00:02:08,580 --> 00:02:11,650 - I DO SAY. 55 00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:14,380 - GOSH, GOLLY. 56 00:02:14,420 --> 00:02:17,850 WHO KNEW GAINFUL EMPLOY COULD BE SUCH A PANTY PEELER? 57 00:02:17,890 --> 00:02:19,520 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT. 58 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:25,230 BEFORE--OKAY, BEFORE THIS ACCELERATES INTO HEAVY PETTING, 59 00:02:25,260 --> 00:02:27,530 MOIST HUMPING, AND MULTIPLE ORGASMS 60 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,230 FOR ME, OF COURSE, 61 00:02:29,270 --> 00:02:32,470 THERE'S SOMETHING I GOT TO TELL YOU. 62 00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:33,670 - WHAT? 63 00:02:33,700 --> 00:02:34,870 WHAT? WHAT IS IT NOW? 64 00:02:34,900 --> 00:02:36,410 - MM-- - I KNOW. 65 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:38,310 YOU'RE A HEROIN ADDICT. 66 00:02:38,340 --> 00:02:40,710 YOU HAVE TERMINAL HEMORRHOIDS, RIGHT? 67 00:02:40,740 --> 00:02:42,310 - OW! - [laughing] 68 00:02:42,350 --> 00:02:44,450 I MEAN, NOTHING WOULD SURPRISE ME AT THIS POINT. 69 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:45,580 [door opens] COME ON. 70 00:02:45,620 --> 00:02:47,980 WHAT IS IT? 71 00:02:48,020 --> 00:02:49,820 - AH, NOTHING? 72 00:02:49,850 --> 00:02:50,690 - NOPE. 73 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:51,990 NOT A TWITCH. 74 00:02:52,020 --> 00:02:54,820 I EVEN TOSSED HIS SALAD FOR A SECOND OR THREE. 75 00:02:54,860 --> 00:02:56,330 KID LIVES FOR FUCKING ASS PLAY. 76 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:58,700 - UGH! YOU THINK THIS IS MAYBE PSYCHOLOGICAL? 77 00:02:58,730 --> 00:03:00,430 - I DON'T KNOW. 78 00:03:00,460 --> 00:03:04,330 - ALL I KNOW IS THAT IT WAS LIKE SUCKING ON A LITTLE HOTDOG 79 00:03:04,370 --> 00:03:05,470 WRAPPED IN FORESKIN. 80 00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:06,740 - [shrill groan] 81 00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:09,710 - AND THE MORE I SUCKED, THE SMALLER IT GOT. 82 00:03:09,740 --> 00:03:13,480 IT FELT WRONG, LIKE I WAS BLOWING A BABY. 83 00:03:13,510 --> 00:03:16,350 A BIG, BALD, UNEMPLOYABLE BABY. 84 00:03:16,380 --> 00:03:18,580 LOOK AT THE FOUR OF US. 85 00:03:18,620 --> 00:03:21,550 AIN'T LOVE FUCKING GRAND? HUH? 86 00:03:21,590 --> 00:03:24,550 [upbeat music] 87 00:03:24,590 --> 00:03:32,300 * 88 00:04:06,830 --> 00:04:08,770 - HOW'D SHE TAKE IT? 89 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:09,900 - I WAS JUST ABOUT TO LAY IT ON HER 90 00:04:09,930 --> 00:04:11,370 WHEN YOU SULKED INTO THE ROOM 91 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:13,300 WITH ALL YOUR BROKEN WEINER SADNESS. 92 00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:15,370 - OH, RIGHT. SORRY ABOUT THAT. 93 00:04:15,410 --> 00:04:17,070 - NO, IT'S OKAY. IT'S PROBABLY FOR THE BEST. 94 00:04:17,110 --> 00:04:18,810 'CAUSE WE SURELY WOULD HAVE MADE THE LOVE, 95 00:04:18,840 --> 00:04:20,540 AND THAT SURELY WOULD HAVE BEEN SPECTACULAR, 96 00:04:20,580 --> 00:04:22,510 AND THEN SHE SURELY WOULD HAVE BEEN SUPER FUCKING PISSED 97 00:04:22,550 --> 00:04:24,680 WHEN SHE FOUND OUT I ALLEGEDLY FATHERED A SON 98 00:04:24,710 --> 00:04:26,520 WITH ANOTHER WOMAN, ALLEGEDLY. 99 00:04:26,550 --> 00:04:27,920 JESUS! 100 00:04:27,950 --> 00:04:29,690 IT SOUNDS UNCOOL WHEN I SAY IT OUT LOUD LIKE THAT. 101 00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:31,920 - WHY? YOU GOT A SON, MAN! 102 00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:33,690 SOMEONE TO CARRY ON THE MOODINESS 103 00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:35,330 FOR GENERATIONS TO COME. 104 00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:37,530 DOESN'T THAT FEEL AMAZING? - NOT REALLY. 105 00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:40,000 THE KID'S KIND OF ANNOYING. I MEAN, SUPER FUCKING ANNOYING 106 00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:41,500 LIKE HE SHOULD BE YOUR SON AND NOT MINE. 107 00:04:41,530 --> 00:04:42,900 [phone ringing] 108 00:04:42,930 --> 00:04:44,670 SEE, THE LITTLE FUCKER KEEPS TRYING TO FACETIME ME. 109 00:04:44,700 --> 00:04:46,070 LOOK AT THAT. 110 00:04:46,100 --> 00:04:48,940 HE SHALL BE LEVON, AND I SHALL DECLINE THAT SHIT. 111 00:04:48,970 --> 00:04:51,380 - SO WHO'S THE MOM? 112 00:04:51,410 --> 00:04:52,980 - OH, THIS WOMAN, JULIA, I WAS SEEING AT THE TIME. 113 00:04:53,010 --> 00:04:55,080 WANTED TO BE AN ACTRESS. SHE WAS GORGEOUS. 114 00:04:55,110 --> 00:04:58,080 WE HAD A LOT OF FUN. IN AND OUT OF THE BOUDOIR. 115 00:04:58,110 --> 00:04:59,080 I REMEMBER THAT. 116 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:01,420 AND THEN I MET AND QUICKLY IMPREGNATED KAREN, 117 00:05:01,450 --> 00:05:02,850 AND THAT, AS THEY SAY, WAS THAT. 118 00:05:02,890 --> 00:05:04,950 BY THE WAY, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE? 119 00:05:04,990 --> 00:05:07,560 - I WANTED TO MAKE SURE YOU SHOWED UP FOR WORK, YOU KNOW, 120 00:05:07,590 --> 00:05:09,890 ON TIME, REASONABLY SOBER. 121 00:05:09,930 --> 00:05:11,930 YOU'RE GONNA BE PULLING IN A WEEKLY SALARY NOW. 122 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,560 15% OF YOUR WEEKLY IS MY WEEKLY. 123 00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:15,970 - 15%? I THOUGHT YOU GOT 10. 124 00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:17,730 - MM-MM. MANAGERS TAKE 15. 125 00:05:17,770 --> 00:05:20,470 - OH, SO YOU'RE MY MANAGER NOW? WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE? 126 00:05:20,500 --> 00:05:21,640 - 5%. 127 00:05:21,670 --> 00:05:23,640 - THAT IS FUCKING PATHETIC, CHARLIE. 128 00:05:23,670 --> 00:05:25,710 MAYBE YOU SHOULD THINK ABOUT GETTING SOME OTHER CLIENTS. 129 00:05:25,740 --> 00:05:27,540 - YEAH, WELL, THAT'S THE OTHER REASON I'M HERE. 130 00:05:27,580 --> 00:05:29,880 - OKAY. LET ME LOOK AT YOU. 131 00:05:29,910 --> 00:05:32,020 LET ME DRINK YOU IN, BIG BOY. 132 00:05:32,050 --> 00:05:33,820 SO WHAT IF YOU GOT A DYSFUNCTIONAL DONG? 133 00:05:33,850 --> 00:05:35,850 SO WHAT IF YOUR COCK IS BUT A VESTIGIAL ORGAN? 134 00:05:35,890 --> 00:05:37,690 YOU'RE STILL A FUCKING SHARK! 135 00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:39,460 - LET'S DO THIS! - NO! 136 00:05:39,490 --> 00:05:40,890 - NO WHAT? 137 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:43,130 - NO, THIS IS MY FIRST DAY OF WORK, CHARLIE, NOT YOURS. 138 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:45,730 MINE. I CAN'T LET YOU FUCK MY SHIT UP. 139 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:49,900 I STILL LOVE YOU, THOUGH. LONG TIME. 140 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,440 - HERE YOU ARE. - THANK YOU. 141 00:05:57,470 --> 00:05:58,580 HEY. HANK. 142 00:05:58,610 --> 00:05:59,710 - TERRY. - RIGHT ON. 143 00:05:59,740 --> 00:06:01,010 WHOA! - OH! 144 00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:02,880 - THAT'S A POWERFUL GRIP YOU GOT THERE. 145 00:06:02,910 --> 00:06:04,550 QUITE A HANDSHAKE. VERY FIRM. 146 00:06:04,580 --> 00:06:06,780 VERY FIRM INDEED. 147 00:06:06,820 --> 00:06:10,650 WHERE DO YOU WORK OUT? 148 00:06:10,690 --> 00:06:12,060 FUCK. 149 00:06:14,190 --> 00:06:15,690 - WELCOME. 150 00:06:15,730 --> 00:06:17,160 - HEY. HANK. 151 00:06:17,190 --> 00:06:19,600 - HUGH. 152 00:06:19,630 --> 00:06:21,430 ARE YOU INTO CUPCAKES? 153 00:06:21,470 --> 00:06:23,000 - I SUPPOSE. 154 00:06:23,030 --> 00:06:24,900 - THERE'S SOME IN THE KITCHEN. 155 00:06:24,930 --> 00:06:26,070 - RIGHT ON. 156 00:06:26,100 --> 00:06:28,970 - SOMETIMES RATH GETS A LITTLE GRUMPY. 157 00:06:29,010 --> 00:06:30,510 I LIKE TO CHEER HIM UP WITH CUPCAKES. 158 00:06:30,540 --> 00:06:31,580 IT'S THE LITTLE THINGS. 159 00:06:31,610 --> 00:06:34,910 - WELL, AREN'T YOU THE THOUGHTFUL LITTLE BEAVER. 160 00:06:34,940 --> 00:06:37,550 SO WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH VICTOR/VICTORIA? 161 00:06:37,580 --> 00:06:38,880 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 162 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:40,450 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT DO I MEAN? TERRY. 163 00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:43,820 WHAT'S UP WITH THAT, HER/HIM GENDER-WISE? 164 00:06:43,850 --> 00:06:45,920 - OH, THAT. OF COURSE. 165 00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:48,060 OKAY, SO HERE'S THE DEAL. IT'S-- 166 00:06:50,030 --> 00:06:52,630 HEY, TERRY. YOU WANT A CUPCAKE? 167 00:06:52,660 --> 00:06:53,930 THERE'S SOME IN THE KITCHEN. 168 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,670 - FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKING CUPCAKES, HUGH! 169 00:06:56,700 --> 00:06:58,870 GET A FUCKING LIFE. 170 00:06:58,900 --> 00:07:00,170 - OKAY, COOL. 171 00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:01,640 I'M GONNA GO WORK ON SOME STORY IDEAS. 172 00:07:01,670 --> 00:07:03,940 I'LL SEE YOU IN THE ROOM, KIDS. 173 00:07:03,970 --> 00:07:06,780 - "FUCK YOU," YOU SAID. THAT WAS FUNNY. 174 00:07:06,810 --> 00:07:08,750 SO, TERRY, TELL ME A BIT ABOUT YOURSELF. 175 00:07:08,780 --> 00:07:10,850 YOU MARRIED? YOU HAVE KIDS? 176 00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:12,850 - I'M IN A LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP, 177 00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:15,220 AND THESE ARE MY KIDS. 178 00:07:15,250 --> 00:07:18,960 - AH, HA, HA, LITTLE DROOLY, BUT I SEE THE RESEMBLANCE. 179 00:07:18,990 --> 00:07:21,690 [phone ringing] 180 00:07:21,730 --> 00:07:23,760 OH, I SHALL DECL--FUCK! 181 00:07:23,790 --> 00:07:25,030 - FACETIME! 182 00:07:25,060 --> 00:07:26,560 - YOU GOT TO STOP CALLING ME, KID. 183 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:27,800 - WHY? 184 00:07:27,830 --> 00:07:30,100 - BECAUSE I'M WORKING. - BUT YOU'RE MY FATHER. 185 00:07:30,130 --> 00:07:32,600 - YEAH, WELL, WE DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW THAT FOR SURE. 186 00:07:32,640 --> 00:07:34,670 - CALLING ME A LIAR? 187 00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:35,970 - NO, NOT TECHNICALLY. 188 00:07:36,010 --> 00:07:37,970 - YOU'RE A REAL FUCKING ASSHOLE, YOU KNOW THAT? 189 00:07:38,010 --> 00:07:39,880 - NOW YOU SOUND LIKE MY KID. 190 00:07:39,910 --> 00:07:41,110 - WANT TO HANG OUT? 191 00:07:41,140 --> 00:07:43,050 - NO, I CAN'T. I'M WORKING. 192 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:44,510 - COOL. WHERE YOU WORKING AT? 193 00:07:44,550 --> 00:07:45,580 - A TELEVISION SHOW. 194 00:07:45,620 --> 00:07:46,880 - COOL! WHICH ONE? 195 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:48,120 - SANTA MONICA COP. 196 00:07:48,150 --> 00:07:49,290 - IS THAT LIKE BEVERLY HILLS COP? 197 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:51,960 - NO, IT'S SET IN SANTA MONICA. 198 00:07:51,990 --> 00:07:54,190 - CAN I COME SEE YOU? - NO, I'M BUSY. 199 00:07:54,220 --> 00:07:55,790 - CAN YOU GET ME A JOB THERE? 200 00:07:55,830 --> 00:07:58,030 - NO. I BARELY HAVE A JOB HERE. 201 00:07:58,060 --> 00:07:59,530 - HEY, GUYS. 202 00:07:59,560 --> 00:08:01,060 RATH'S STUCK IN A MEETING AT THE NETWORK, 203 00:08:01,100 --> 00:08:02,800 SO FEEL FREE TO DO WHATEVER UNTIL LUNCH. 204 00:08:02,830 --> 00:08:04,800 - COOL! YOU WANT TO COME OVER? 205 00:08:04,830 --> 00:08:07,800 [hard rock] 206 00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:14,280 * 207 00:08:14,310 --> 00:08:15,110 I'M SORRY. 208 00:08:15,140 --> 00:08:16,850 HAVE YOU BEEN KNOCKING FOR A WHILE? 209 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:18,150 I WAS LISTENING TO SOME TUNES. 210 00:08:18,180 --> 00:08:20,280 - NO, NO, I PRETTY MUCH JUST KNOCKED THE ONCE, 211 00:08:20,320 --> 00:08:21,750 AND THEN YOU IMMEDIATELY OPENED THE DOOR, 212 00:08:21,790 --> 00:08:22,990 WHICH LEADS ME TO BELIEVE 213 00:08:23,020 --> 00:08:24,150 YOU WERE JUST RIGHT THERE WAITING FOR ME. 214 00:08:24,190 --> 00:08:25,890 - YOU TOTALLY GOT ME. 215 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:27,060 I WAS PRETTY FUCKING EXCITED. 216 00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:30,930 - HEY, THIS IS FOR YOU. 217 00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:33,930 OH, ALL RIGHT. - [laughing] 218 00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:36,000 - GOOD MAN. ALL RIGHT. 219 00:08:36,030 --> 00:08:38,000 THERE YOU GO. 220 00:08:42,070 --> 00:08:43,240 NICE PLACE YOU GOT HERE. 221 00:08:43,270 --> 00:08:45,740 - YEAH, YOU KNOW, IT'S HOME. 222 00:08:45,780 --> 00:08:48,650 - WOW! YOUR MOM. 223 00:08:48,680 --> 00:08:50,650 I GOT TO SAY SHE'S STILL SMOKING HOT. 224 00:08:50,680 --> 00:08:52,320 - YEAH, PEOPLE SAY THAT ALL THE TIME. 225 00:08:52,350 --> 00:08:54,050 I GUESS I JUST DON'T SEE HER THAT WAY. 226 00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:55,790 - RIGHT. BECAUSE SHE'S YOUR MOM. 227 00:08:55,820 --> 00:08:59,360 I'M JUST COMMENTING AS SOMEONE, YOU KNOW, WHO KNEW HER WHEN... 228 00:08:59,390 --> 00:09:01,120 - OKAY, THEN. - ABOUT HER BEAUTY. 229 00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:03,730 - THAT'S YOUR THING. - WELL-- 230 00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:06,730 YOU SURE DO HAVE A LOT OF PICTURES OF YOUR MOM AROUND. 231 00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:10,300 AND I'M GUESSING THAT YOU DON'T HAVE TOO MANY GIRLS OVER, HUH? 232 00:09:10,330 --> 00:09:12,740 - [clears throat] NO. NO, I DON'T. 233 00:09:12,770 --> 00:09:15,200 WHICH IS A SOURCE OF GREAT SADNESS FOR ME, 234 00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:17,310 BUT THE PICTURES ARE MY MOM'S THING. 235 00:09:17,340 --> 00:09:19,210 SHE LIKES HAVING THEM AROUND, I GUESS. 236 00:09:19,240 --> 00:09:20,280 - YOU'RE A GROWN MAN-CHILD, DUDE. 237 00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:21,950 YOU CAN DO WHATEVS YOU WANT. 238 00:09:21,980 --> 00:09:24,850 - YEAH, I GUESS, BUT I STILL HAVE TO RESPECT HER WISHES, 239 00:09:24,880 --> 00:09:26,080 YOU KNOW. 240 00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:27,080 SHE'S MY MOM. 241 00:09:27,120 --> 00:09:28,720 - SURE, I SUPPOSE, 242 00:09:28,750 --> 00:09:31,350 IF YOU WANT TO BE ALL QUEER ABOUT IT. 243 00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:34,920 YOU HAVE A ROOMMATE? [door opening] 244 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:36,230 - [mouthing words] 245 00:09:36,260 --> 00:09:40,130 - LEVON, DID YOU TAKE MY TOOTHPASTE AGAIN? 246 00:09:43,130 --> 00:09:44,700 WHAT THE FUCK? 247 00:09:44,730 --> 00:09:47,140 - I COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT ANY BETTER MYSELF. 248 00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:50,370 - MOM, DAD, DON'T BE MAD. 249 00:09:50,410 --> 00:09:53,840 - UH, IF IT'S ANY CONSOLATION, I WAS JUST COMMENTING TO THE BOY 250 00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:57,850 THAT YOU STILL GOT IT, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE STILL SMOKING HOT. 251 00:09:57,880 --> 00:10:01,650 - OH, MY GOD. - [laughing] 252 00:10:01,690 --> 00:10:03,850 - YOU LIVE WITH YOUR MOM. - OBVIOUSLY. 253 00:10:03,890 --> 00:10:05,390 - YOU DON'T THINK YOU COULD HAVE MENTIONED THAT? 254 00:10:05,420 --> 00:10:06,820 - WOULD YOU HAVE STILL COME OVER? 255 00:10:06,860 --> 00:10:07,990 - PROBABLY NOT. - SEE? 256 00:10:08,020 --> 00:10:09,990 I DID THE RIGHT THING THEN. 257 00:10:10,030 --> 00:10:13,900 - DOES SHE KNOW THAT YOU MADE CONTACT? 258 00:10:13,930 --> 00:10:15,060 - SHE DOES NOW. 259 00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:16,900 - SWEET JUMPING JESUS. 260 00:10:16,930 --> 00:10:19,200 - LEVON, CAN YOU COME IN HERE A MINUTE, PLEASE? 261 00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,140 - COMING, MOM! 262 00:10:21,170 --> 00:10:24,140 SIT, STAY. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 263 00:10:24,170 --> 00:10:28,340 EAT SOME OF THOSE COLD CUTS. I MADE THEM FOR YOU. 264 00:10:28,380 --> 00:10:32,320 HEY, DON'T LEAVE, OKAY? AGAIN. 265 00:10:34,080 --> 00:10:38,320 [low arguing] 266 00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:41,460 - WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING?! 267 00:10:41,490 --> 00:10:44,090 - [muted response] 268 00:10:45,330 --> 00:10:47,230 - HANK. - HI, JULIA. 269 00:10:47,260 --> 00:10:51,000 - IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU. - NICE TO SEE YOU TOO. 270 00:10:51,030 --> 00:10:52,770 - I'LL BE IN TOUCH. 271 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:53,740 - HOW DO YOU MEAN? 272 00:10:53,770 --> 00:10:56,210 - THIS IS JUST A LOT TO PROCESS RIGHT NOW. 273 00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:57,410 - YES. - I THINK I NEED SOME TIME. 274 00:10:57,440 --> 00:10:58,940 - YEAH, I GET THAT. I GET THAT. 275 00:10:58,980 --> 00:11:00,780 I GET THAT. 276 00:11:00,810 --> 00:11:03,310 SO HE'S--I'M GUESSING THAT HE'S REALLY MINE? 277 00:11:03,350 --> 00:11:05,280 - WHAT? - HE'S REALLY MY KID? 278 00:11:05,310 --> 00:11:08,380 I MEAN, ALL I HAVE IS HIS WORD TO GO ON, 279 00:11:08,420 --> 00:11:10,150 AND NO OFFENSE, BUT HE DOESN'T PRESENT 280 00:11:10,190 --> 00:11:11,990 AS THE MOST TRUSTWORTHY SOURCE. 281 00:11:12,020 --> 00:11:13,790 - I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE. 282 00:11:13,820 --> 00:11:15,120 - OKAY, YEAH, FUCK. 283 00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:16,430 SHIT. 284 00:11:16,460 --> 00:11:19,060 - I'M STILL STANDING HERE. - PLEASE LEAVE. 285 00:11:19,100 --> 00:11:22,470 - I COULD--I DON'T HAVE TO BE BACK AT WORK FOR A FEW MINUTES. 286 00:11:22,500 --> 00:11:25,000 WE COULD SIT AND TALK. - OH, GOD. 287 00:11:25,030 --> 00:11:27,100 - OR--OR--OR I COULD GO. 288 00:11:27,140 --> 00:11:29,510 GOING, GOING, GONE. OKAY. 289 00:11:29,540 --> 00:11:31,510 LEVON, ALWAYS A PLEASURE. - BYE, DAD. 290 00:11:31,540 --> 00:11:33,380 - CATCH YOU ON THE FLIPPITY-FLOP. 291 00:11:38,150 --> 00:11:40,820 - THAT'S A GOOD-LOOKING SAMMIE YOU GOT THERE, HANK. 292 00:11:40,850 --> 00:11:42,020 I WENT WITH THE BURGER. 293 00:11:42,050 --> 00:11:43,350 THAT'S THE MOVE FROM THIS PLACE. 294 00:11:43,390 --> 00:11:45,890 I'M PRETTY HAPPY ABOUT MY LUNCH ORDER RIGHT NOW. 295 00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:47,460 KILLED IT. 296 00:11:47,490 --> 00:11:49,490 - THIS IS GLUTEN-FREE, RIGHT? - I'D STAKE MY LIFE ON IT. 297 00:11:49,530 --> 00:11:52,230 - AND IT HASN'T BEEN IN THE VICINITY OF ANY SHELLFISH? 298 00:11:52,260 --> 00:11:54,500 - I WATCHED THEM COOK IT JUST LIKE YOU ASKED. 299 00:11:54,530 --> 00:11:56,130 - THANK YOU. I DON'T MEAN TO BE A NUDGE. 300 00:11:56,170 --> 00:11:57,800 - YEAH, WE GOT IT, GOLDIE, OKAY? 301 00:11:57,830 --> 00:11:58,800 HEY, LOOK AT ME. 302 00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:00,440 I'M ALLERGIC TO FUCKING EVERYTHING, ALL RIGHT? 303 00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:01,970 MAYBE YOU SHOULD BROWN BAG IT TOMORROW. 304 00:12:02,010 --> 00:12:04,370 MAKE YOURSELF A LITTLE PBandJ OR SOMETHING. 305 00:12:04,410 --> 00:12:06,210 - I HAVE A SEVERE NUT ALLERGY. 306 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:08,040 - YEAH, OF COURSE YOU DO. - I COULD DIE. 307 00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:09,810 - THAT WOULD BE A SHAME. 308 00:12:12,280 --> 00:12:14,250 [picture snaps] 309 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:15,520 WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? 310 00:12:15,550 --> 00:12:17,390 - TAKING A PICTURE OF MY BURGER. 311 00:12:17,420 --> 00:12:18,890 - WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TAKING A PICTURE OF YOUR BURGER? 312 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:20,420 - 'CAUSE I WANT TO PUT IT ON MY INSTAGRAM. 313 00:12:20,460 --> 00:12:21,790 - OH, YOU'RE GONNA PUT IT ON YOUR INSTAGRAM. 314 00:12:21,830 --> 00:12:23,160 OF COURSE. WELL, THAT MAKES SENSE. 315 00:12:23,190 --> 00:12:24,460 - YEAH. - IT'S A BEAUTIFUL BURGER. 316 00:12:24,490 --> 00:12:25,800 - YEAH, - I KNOW, RIGHT? 317 00:12:25,830 --> 00:12:27,900 - YEAH. YEAH. ABSOLUTELY. 318 00:12:27,930 --> 00:12:29,370 IT'S A GORGEOUS BURGER. 319 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:30,900 SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. 320 00:12:30,930 --> 00:12:33,540 IT'S NOT ENOUGH THAT I HAVE TO WATCH YOU CHEW 321 00:12:33,570 --> 00:12:35,440 WITH YOUR MOUTH OPEN EVERY FUCKING DAY. 322 00:12:35,470 --> 00:12:37,570 NOW I'M GONNA HAVE TO WATCH YOU PLAY DIANE ARBUS 323 00:12:37,610 --> 00:12:38,670 WITH YOUR FOOD? 324 00:12:38,710 --> 00:12:41,510 HOW ABOUT I BRING SOME STARVING AFRICAN KID IN HERE, 325 00:12:41,540 --> 00:12:44,410 HAVE HIM WATCH YOU TAKE A PICTURE OF YOUR GOURMET BURGER 326 00:12:44,450 --> 00:12:46,550 WITH YOUR FUCKING IPHONE? 327 00:12:46,580 --> 00:12:48,180 OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF. 328 00:12:48,220 --> 00:12:49,920 MAYBE YOU SHOULD SPEND A LITTLE LESS TIME 329 00:12:49,950 --> 00:12:51,350 SEXUALIZING YOUR LUNCH, 330 00:12:51,390 --> 00:12:52,590 AND A LITTLE MORE TIME COMING UP 331 00:12:52,620 --> 00:12:54,560 WITH A WORKABLE FUCKING STORY IDEA. 332 00:12:54,590 --> 00:12:55,620 - COME ON, RATH. 333 00:12:55,660 --> 00:12:57,430 I PITCHED YOU FIVE BRAND-NEW IDEAS THIS MORNING. 334 00:12:57,460 --> 00:12:59,300 - AND EVERY ONE OF THEM SUCKED, MAN! 335 00:12:59,330 --> 00:13:00,460 DO BETTER! 336 00:13:00,500 --> 00:13:02,370 STOP INSTAGRAMING, STOP TWEETING! 337 00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:04,530 I DO READ THEM, YOU KNOW, 338 00:13:04,570 --> 00:13:06,270 WHEN I'M IN THE MOOD FOR A RAGING HATE-BONER. 339 00:13:06,300 --> 00:13:07,570 - [sighs] 340 00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:09,010 - HANK, YOU'RE AWFULLY QUIET OVER THERE. 341 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:10,370 WHAT'S HAPPENING? 342 00:13:10,410 --> 00:13:12,040 - SORRY, USUALLY, I'M A FUCKING FIRECRACKER, 343 00:13:12,080 --> 00:13:14,280 BUT I'M JUST DEALING WITH SOME HEAVY SHIT RIGHT NOW. 344 00:13:14,310 --> 00:13:15,440 - TELL US. 345 00:13:15,480 --> 00:13:17,110 - I'D RATHER NOT. 346 00:13:17,150 --> 00:13:18,310 - HANK, THIS IS WHAT WE DO IN HERE. 347 00:13:18,350 --> 00:13:19,920 THIS IS CHURCH. 348 00:13:19,950 --> 00:13:22,120 THIS IS WHERE WE CONFESS OUR DEEPEST, DARKEST SECRETS, 349 00:13:22,150 --> 00:13:23,290 SHOOT 'EM THROUGH A PRISM, 350 00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:24,520 PUT 'EM UP THERE ON THE SCREEN. 351 00:13:24,550 --> 00:13:25,290 - OH, GOD. 352 00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:27,060 - ALL RIGHT, IF YOU MUST KNOW, 353 00:13:27,090 --> 00:13:29,960 I RECENTLY DISCOVERED THAT I HAVE FATHERED A SON 354 00:13:29,990 --> 00:13:32,330 FROM A RELATIONSHIP ABOUT 20 YEARS AGO. 355 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:33,460 - OH, WOW! - HOLY SHIT. 356 00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:34,460 THAT IS FUCKING HEAVY. 357 00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:36,030 - PERFECT. - YIKES! 358 00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:38,200 - THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE. - I GOT A LAWYER. 359 00:13:38,230 --> 00:13:40,340 THOSE 20 YEARS' CHILD SUPPORT, YOU DON'T WANT TO PAY THAT. 360 00:13:40,370 --> 00:13:41,470 - OKAY, PEOPLE. - I'LL HOOK YOU UP. 361 00:13:41,500 --> 00:13:43,010 - HOW DO WE USE THIS ON THE SHOW? 362 00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:44,410 - GOD. 363 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:46,110 - OKAY, SO MAYBE DANKO HAS A BABY WITH A STRANGER, 364 00:13:46,140 --> 00:13:49,010 BUT THE STRANGER HAPPENS TO BE, LIKE, A COUSIN FROM THE PAST. 365 00:13:49,050 --> 00:13:50,210 - A RETARDED COUSIN. 366 00:13:50,250 --> 00:13:51,380 - A RETARDED COUSIN FROM THE PAST. 367 00:13:51,410 --> 00:13:52,580 - CAN'T SAY "RETARDED." AUTISTIC. 368 00:13:52,620 --> 00:13:54,050 - AN AUTISTIC COUSIN FROM THE PAST. 369 00:13:54,080 --> 00:13:55,220 - OOH, TITLE OF THE SHOW, "AW... both: "TISTIC." 370 00:13:55,250 --> 00:13:56,420 - I GOT IT, I GOT IT. 371 00:13:56,450 --> 00:13:57,490 HERE, THIS IS THE BAD VERSION NOW. 372 00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:58,960 WHAT IF DANKO JONES-- 373 00:13:58,990 --> 00:14:00,360 - DIDN'T YOU ALSO RAPE A WOMAN ONCE? 374 00:14:00,390 --> 00:14:02,660 - WOW. HARSH! - STAND DOWN, TERRY! 375 00:14:02,690 --> 00:14:04,390 - WHAT? IT'S TRUE. IT WAS ALL OVER THE NEWS. 376 00:14:04,430 --> 00:14:06,160 - YEAH. [chuckles] 377 00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:07,530 - IF ANYBODY WAS RAPED, IT WAS ME, 378 00:14:07,560 --> 00:14:09,270 AND IT WAS ALL JUST A BIG MISUNDERSTANDING ANYWAY. 379 00:14:09,300 --> 00:14:10,630 IT COULD HAVE HAPPENED TO ANYONE. 380 00:14:10,670 --> 00:14:12,400 - WISH IT HAPPENED TO ME. SHE WAS REALLY HOT. 381 00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:13,940 - SHE'S SO SKINNY. 382 00:14:13,970 --> 00:14:15,940 - I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO SHARE AN OFFICE 383 00:14:15,970 --> 00:14:16,640 WITH A CONVICTED RAPIST. 384 00:14:16,670 --> 00:14:17,910 - WHAT IF A WEAR A COCK CAGE? 385 00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,310 - I LIKE THAT. I LIKE THAT. 386 00:14:19,340 --> 00:14:20,640 [all talking] 387 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:22,080 - IT'S A MALE CHASTITY DEVICE. 388 00:14:22,110 --> 00:14:23,380 - I NEED ONE OF THOSE. 389 00:14:23,410 --> 00:14:25,110 - IT TRAPS YOUR PENIS IN A FLACCID STATE. 390 00:14:25,150 --> 00:14:26,520 - EVEN DANKO COULD BE IN HIS OWN COCK CAGE. 391 00:14:26,550 --> 00:14:28,080 IT'S LIKE HE FEELS TRAPPED 392 00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:29,420 'CAUSE HE'S IN HIS OWN COCK CAGE. 393 00:14:29,450 --> 00:14:31,120 - WHY? WHY WOULD HE BE IN A COCK CAGE? 394 00:14:31,150 --> 00:14:32,590 - DESPITE ALL HIS RAGE, HE IS STILL JUST A COCK IN A CAGE. 395 00:14:32,620 --> 00:14:34,390 - YOU THINK RAPE IS FUNNY? - NO! 396 00:14:34,420 --> 00:14:36,430 I THINK IT'S AWFUL, UNLESS IT'S A WOMAN RAPING A MAN. 397 00:14:36,460 --> 00:14:37,590 THAT'S INHERENTLY FUNNY. 398 00:14:37,630 --> 00:14:39,230 - RATH, ARE YOU REALLY-- - WHAT? 399 00:14:39,260 --> 00:14:41,060 - ARE YOU JUST GONNA SIT HERE AND LET THIS HAPPEN? 400 00:14:41,100 --> 00:14:42,400 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 401 00:14:42,430 --> 00:14:43,500 FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THREE WEEKS, 402 00:14:43,530 --> 00:14:45,200 I'M ACTUALLY ENJOYING MYSELF. 403 00:14:45,230 --> 00:14:47,600 PLEASE CONTINUE. - GOLDIE, ARE YOU OKAY? 404 00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:51,440 - THAT WAS NOT GLUTEN-FREE. 405 00:14:51,470 --> 00:14:53,310 [all gasping] 406 00:14:53,340 --> 00:14:56,050 - OH! WHAT THE FU-- GOLDIE? 407 00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:57,950 - AT LEAST WE KNOW IT WASN'T ALL IN YOUR HEAD. 408 00:14:57,980 --> 00:14:59,420 - MY FUCKING MOM JUST GOT ME THIS SHIT, GOLDIE! 409 00:14:59,450 --> 00:15:01,150 - JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! 410 00:15:01,180 --> 00:15:03,220 I'VE SEEN CRIME SCENES LESS DISGUSTING THAN THAT. 411 00:15:03,250 --> 00:15:04,420 - I THINK LUNCH IS OVER. 412 00:15:04,450 --> 00:15:05,550 - THEY TOLD ME IT WAS GLUTEN-FREE. 413 00:15:05,590 --> 00:15:06,560 - CLEAN THIS SHIT UP! - SHIT! 414 00:15:06,590 --> 00:15:08,020 - CLEAN THIS SHIT UP! 415 00:15:08,060 --> 00:15:09,430 DISINFECT THE WHOLE FUCKING ROOM, OKAY? 416 00:15:09,460 --> 00:15:10,690 I'M GONNA GO MEDITATE. 417 00:15:10,730 --> 00:15:12,660 WE'LL RECONVENE IN A COUPLE OF HOURS 418 00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:15,330 - DOES ANYBODY KNOW OF A BAR AROUND HERE 419 00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:16,570 WHERE I COULD MEET SOMEBODY FOR A DRINK? 420 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:17,830 - GOD! 421 00:15:17,870 --> 00:15:20,970 I WOULD LOVE A NICE WINE COOLER RIGHT NOW OR LIKE A MICROBREW. 422 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:22,670 AN ALLAGASH WHITE WOULD TOTALLY HIT THE FUCKING SPOT, RIGHT? 423 00:15:22,710 --> 00:15:24,610 [inhales] BUT HERE'S THE THING. 424 00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:27,040 RATH DOES NOT LIKE IT WHEN WE LEAVE THE OFFICE DURING THE DAY. 425 00:15:27,080 --> 00:15:29,450 IT'S TOTALLY FROWNED UPON. BUT I'M TOTES FREE TONIGHT. 426 00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:31,010 WHAT DO YOU SAY? LET'S DO IT! 427 00:15:31,050 --> 00:15:34,020 [hard rock] 428 00:15:34,050 --> 00:15:41,090 * 429 00:15:52,300 --> 00:15:54,240 [both laugh] 430 00:15:54,270 --> 00:15:56,740 - HMM. - HI. 431 00:15:56,770 --> 00:16:00,040 THANK YOU. 432 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:05,480 HOW COME YOU NEVER TOLD ME? 433 00:16:07,180 --> 00:16:09,090 - THIS IS WHAT I REMEMBER. 434 00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:12,620 WE WERE RUNNING AROUND THE CITY FOR A FEW MONTHS, HANGING OUT, 435 00:16:12,660 --> 00:16:14,760 HAVING FUN, KEEPING IT SIMPLE, 436 00:16:14,790 --> 00:16:16,630 AND THEN ONE DAY THE PHONE STOPPED RINGING. 437 00:16:16,660 --> 00:16:19,030 AND I CALLED YOU TO MAKE SURE YOU WEREN'T DEAD, 438 00:16:19,060 --> 00:16:20,530 AND YOU SAID YOU MET SOMEONE SPECIAL, 439 00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:21,800 SOMEONE THAT YOU COULD PICTURE 440 00:16:21,830 --> 00:16:24,500 SPENDING THE REST OF YOUR LIFE WITH. 441 00:16:24,530 --> 00:16:26,240 I REMEMBER NOT BEING ALL THAT OFFENDED 442 00:16:26,270 --> 00:16:28,800 BECAUSE WE WERE NEVER REALLY THAT TOGETHER. 443 00:16:28,840 --> 00:16:31,440 SO WHEN I REALIZED I WAS KNOCKED UP, 444 00:16:31,470 --> 00:16:35,040 IT SEEMED PRETTY POINTLESS TO TELL YOU. 445 00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:36,480 I'M SORRY. 446 00:16:36,510 --> 00:16:38,780 - NO, I'M SORRY. 447 00:16:38,810 --> 00:16:39,650 - DON'T BE. 448 00:16:39,680 --> 00:16:41,720 I NEVER EXPECTED ANYTHING FROM YOU. 449 00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:45,720 YOU'RE FUN, KIND OF LIKE DRIVING AROUND IN A CAR WITH A DOG 450 00:16:45,750 --> 00:16:47,660 WHO STICKS HIS HEAD OUT THE WINDOW. 451 00:16:47,690 --> 00:16:49,390 - WHAT KIND OF DOG? 452 00:16:49,430 --> 00:16:51,160 - NOT THE MARRYING KIND. 453 00:16:51,190 --> 00:16:53,530 - OH, THAT'S--I DON'T KNOW THAT THAT'S A BREED. 454 00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:55,500 - [laughing] 455 00:16:55,530 --> 00:16:57,130 I DON'T SEE A RING ON YOUR FINGER. 456 00:16:57,170 --> 00:17:00,670 DID YOU EVER GET HITCHED? - UH, NO, NOT TECHNICALLY. 457 00:17:00,700 --> 00:17:03,270 HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE? 458 00:17:03,310 --> 00:17:04,510 - A FEW MONTHS. 459 00:17:04,540 --> 00:17:06,510 WHEN LEVON CAME ALONG, 460 00:17:06,540 --> 00:17:08,410 HE DERAILED THE WHOLE ACTING THING. 461 00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:09,550 - YEAH. 462 00:17:09,580 --> 00:17:11,150 - SO I MOVED BACK TO THE ISLAND, 463 00:17:11,180 --> 00:17:14,150 AND I WENT TO SCHOOL, AND I BECAME A DENTAL HYGIENIST. 464 00:17:14,180 --> 00:17:15,550 - REALLY? - I FUCKING LOVE TEETH. 465 00:17:15,580 --> 00:17:18,150 THEY FASCINATE ME. 466 00:17:18,190 --> 00:17:22,690 OPEN UP. 467 00:17:22,730 --> 00:17:24,160 OOH. - HUH? 468 00:17:24,190 --> 00:17:25,560 - HAVE YOU BEEN TO A DENTIST RECENTLY? 469 00:17:25,590 --> 00:17:27,630 - CAN WE GET BACK TO YOUR STORY? 470 00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:31,100 - SO LEVON DECIDED HE WANTS TO ACT, 471 00:17:31,130 --> 00:17:33,270 AND IT SEEMED LIKE A GOOD TIME FOR A CHANGE OF SCENERY. 472 00:17:33,300 --> 00:17:34,840 SO HERE WE ARE. 473 00:17:34,870 --> 00:17:39,480 - YEAH. SO WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE? 474 00:17:39,510 --> 00:17:41,140 - NOWHERE. 475 00:17:42,650 --> 00:17:44,310 I'D REALLY LOVE IT IF YOU BOWED OUT 476 00:17:44,350 --> 00:17:47,320 AND NEVER SAW HIM AGAIN. 477 00:17:47,350 --> 00:17:48,720 I MEAN, LEVON'S A WEIRD KID. 478 00:17:48,750 --> 00:17:51,150 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 479 00:17:52,360 --> 00:17:54,220 - HE'S GOT ALL THESE CRAZY EXPECTATIONS 480 00:17:54,260 --> 00:17:56,190 OF YOU GUYS MAKING UP FOR LOST TIME. 481 00:17:56,230 --> 00:17:57,590 I DON'T HAVE THE HEART TO TELL HIM 482 00:17:57,630 --> 00:17:59,360 THAT YOU'RE NOT THAT KIND OF GUY. 483 00:17:59,400 --> 00:18:03,830 - HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT KIND OF GUY I AM NOW? 484 00:18:03,870 --> 00:18:06,170 - LOOK, I'M GIVING YOU A GIFT HERE. 485 00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:08,840 I'M TELLING YOU IT'S OKAY TO WALK AWAY. 486 00:18:08,870 --> 00:18:11,640 I'M ASKING YOU NICELY TO JUST DO THE RIGHT THING 487 00:18:11,670 --> 00:18:14,440 AND LEAVE US THE FUCK ALONE. 488 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:17,810 DRINK'S ON ME. [sighs] 489 00:18:26,190 --> 00:18:28,490 - ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS? - YES. 490 00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:29,930 STU USED TO POP THEM ALL THE TIME. 491 00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:32,260 - HMM. HMM? 492 00:18:32,300 --> 00:18:33,660 STU HAS E.D. TOO? 493 00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:36,470 - NO, NOT AT ALL. HE USED TO TAKE THEM FOR FUN. 494 00:18:36,500 --> 00:18:37,770 WE USED TO FUCK FOR HOURS. 495 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:40,240 HIS COCK WAS LIKE A BATTERING RAM. 496 00:18:40,270 --> 00:18:41,870 IT WAS LIKE IT WAS MADE OF LIQUID METAL. 497 00:18:41,900 --> 00:18:43,910 IT WAS THE T-1000 OF BONERS. 498 00:18:43,940 --> 00:18:44,870 - OKAY, MARCY, 499 00:18:44,910 --> 00:18:47,510 I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I CAN SAY THIS, 500 00:18:47,540 --> 00:18:50,950 BUT YOUR FOND REMEMBRANCE OF YOUR EX-HUSBAND'S HORSE COCK 501 00:18:50,980 --> 00:18:53,720 DOES NOT WORK WONDERS FOR MY FRAGILE PSYCHE. 502 00:18:53,750 --> 00:18:55,480 - PUSSY! [phone ringing] 503 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:56,690 - SHIT! THIS IS HANK. 504 00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:57,890 - NO! - I'M SORRY. 505 00:18:57,920 --> 00:18:59,260 I GOT TO TAKE THIS. - NO! 506 00:18:59,290 --> 00:19:00,260 - I GOT TO TAKE IT! 507 00:19:00,290 --> 00:19:01,460 WHAT'S UP, BUDDY? 508 00:19:01,490 --> 00:19:02,660 - HEY, BUDDY, I NEED YOU TO DO ME A FAVOR. 509 00:19:02,690 --> 00:19:04,290 - ANYTHING AT ALL. YOU NAME IT. 510 00:19:04,330 --> 00:19:05,690 - YEAH, YOU GOT TO GET ME OFF OF THIS THING. 511 00:19:05,730 --> 00:19:07,630 - WHAT THING? - THE SHOW. 512 00:19:07,660 --> 00:19:09,200 I JUST CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE. 513 00:19:09,230 --> 00:19:10,800 - HANK, IT'S YOUR FIRST DAY! 514 00:19:10,830 --> 00:19:12,270 - I KNOW, BUT THERE'S TOO MUCH SHIT GOING ON 515 00:19:12,300 --> 00:19:13,300 IN MY PERSONAL LIFE, 516 00:19:13,340 --> 00:19:14,970 AND I'M A DELICATE FUCKING FLOWER. 517 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:16,940 THE THOUGHT ABOUT GETTING BACK IN THERE 518 00:19:16,970 --> 00:19:18,770 WITH THOSE FUCKING MONKEYS IS GIVING ME A FUCKING MIGRAINE. 519 00:19:18,810 --> 00:19:20,210 - WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! 520 00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:21,740 HANK, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! 521 00:19:21,780 --> 00:19:23,480 BACK IN WHERE? WHY AREN'T YOU THERE RIGHT NOW? 522 00:19:23,510 --> 00:19:26,820 - IT'S A LONG STORY. - HANK, GO BACK IN THERE! 523 00:19:26,850 --> 00:19:28,280 YOU TALK IT OUT WITH RATH. 524 00:19:28,320 --> 00:19:30,220 HE'S A COOL GUY. HE'LL UNDERSTAND. 525 00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:32,360 - I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE SAYING, AND I AGREE, 526 00:19:32,390 --> 00:19:33,920 BUT THAT'S WHAT I HAVE YOU FOR, CHARLIE, 527 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:35,590 TO HAVE THE CONVERSATIONS I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE. 528 00:19:35,620 --> 00:19:37,690 THAT'S WHAT THE EXTRA 5% IS FOR. 529 00:19:37,730 --> 00:19:40,300 BESIDES, IT'S LIKE AUDITING A CLASS, RIGHT? 530 00:19:40,330 --> 00:19:42,700 I TRIED IT, IT WASN'T FOR ME. NO HARM, NO FOUL. 531 00:19:42,730 --> 00:19:43,930 - NO, HANK! NO! 532 00:19:43,970 --> 00:19:45,770 THERE IS HARM, AND THERE IS FOUL! 533 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:47,270 JESUS CHRIST! 534 00:19:47,300 --> 00:19:48,770 I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE DOING THIS TO ME 535 00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:50,670 WHEN I'VE JUST TAKEN A FUCKING VIAGRA! 536 00:19:50,710 --> 00:19:51,740 - OH. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT. 537 00:19:51,770 --> 00:19:52,980 MY MIND'S MADE UP, THOUGH. 538 00:19:53,010 --> 00:19:55,410 MAKE IT HAPPEN. SMOOTH THAT SHIT OVER. 539 00:19:55,440 --> 00:19:57,350 - HANK! [grunts] 540 00:19:57,380 --> 00:19:59,420 - [groans] 541 00:19:59,450 --> 00:20:00,680 - HANK! HANK! 542 00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:02,320 THANK GOD YOU'RE HERE. 543 00:20:02,350 --> 00:20:03,950 THIS MOTHERFUCKER'S TRYING TO WATERBOARD ME! PIG! 544 00:20:03,990 --> 00:20:05,950 GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME! - HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY! 545 00:20:05,990 --> 00:20:07,560 - GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF ME! 546 00:20:07,590 --> 00:20:10,430 - STOP! - CALM DOWN! 547 00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:11,860 - HE'S A LITTLE RETARDED. - A LITTLE? 548 00:20:11,890 --> 00:20:13,860 - FUCK YOU, YOU RENT-A-COP MOTHERFUCKER! 549 00:20:13,900 --> 00:20:15,400 YOU DON'T-- - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 550 00:20:15,430 --> 00:20:16,730 YOU CAN'T JUST SHOW UP AT A MOVIE STUDIO 551 00:20:16,770 --> 00:20:18,270 AND EXPECT TO SEE SOMEONE. 552 00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:19,540 - BUT YOU WEREN'T ANSWERING YOUR PHONE, 553 00:20:19,570 --> 00:20:21,270 AND I NEEDED TO SEE YOU. - WHY? 554 00:20:21,300 --> 00:20:23,610 - I THINK MY MOTHER'S TRYING TO KEEP US APART. 555 00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,370 - WHY DO YOU SAY THAT? 556 00:20:25,410 --> 00:20:26,880 - 'CAUSE I THINK SHE'S AFRAID SHE'S GONNA LOSE ME 557 00:20:26,910 --> 00:20:28,640 IF I DEVELOP A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. 558 00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:30,880 - WELL, MAYBE SHE'S JUST AFRAID THAT I'LL DISAPPOINT YOU. 559 00:20:30,910 --> 00:20:32,550 - THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE. YOU'RE MY FATHER, RIGHT? 560 00:20:32,580 --> 00:20:34,750 YOU'D NEVER LET ME DOWN. 561 00:20:34,780 --> 00:20:36,390 - WHAT HAS SHE TOLD YOU ABOUT ME? 562 00:20:36,420 --> 00:20:38,520 - NOT MUCH. JUST THAT SHE GOT KNOCKED UP 563 00:20:38,550 --> 00:20:40,420 BY SOME GUY SHE DIDN'T KNOW VERY WELL, 564 00:20:40,460 --> 00:20:42,490 A GUY WHO DIDN'T SEEM LIKE MUCH OF A FATHER FIGURE. 565 00:20:42,530 --> 00:20:43,830 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? 566 00:20:43,860 --> 00:20:46,860 YOU NEVER KNEW, SO I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU SHOULD. 567 00:20:46,900 --> 00:20:48,460 I DON'T KNOW. 568 00:20:48,500 --> 00:20:50,070 I NEVER TOLD HER I WAS TRYING TO FIND YOU. 569 00:20:50,100 --> 00:20:51,830 I DIDN'T WANT TO HURT HER FEELINGS. 570 00:20:51,870 --> 00:20:53,840 BUT I DID MY RESEARCH, AND WHEN WE MOVED OUT HERE, 571 00:20:53,870 --> 00:20:55,770 I KNEW THAT WAS MY OPPORTUNITY TO COME FIND YOU. 572 00:20:57,370 --> 00:21:00,440 - YOU KNOW, YOUR MOM HAS DONE A PRETTY GOOD JOB ALL BY HERSELF. 573 00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:03,780 - YEAH, SHE'S PRETTY COOL, DON'T GET ME WRONG. 574 00:21:03,810 --> 00:21:05,310 IT'S JUST BEING RAISED BY A SINGLE MOM 575 00:21:05,350 --> 00:21:06,920 HAS MADE ME REALLY FUCKING WEIRD. 576 00:21:06,950 --> 00:21:09,320 I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO RELATE TO OTHER GUYS. 577 00:21:09,350 --> 00:21:11,350 - SHE DIDN'T HAVE ANY BOYFRIENDS AROUND? 578 00:21:11,390 --> 00:21:14,020 - SOME. I'M SURE I SCARED THEM AWAY. 579 00:21:14,060 --> 00:21:16,330 - YEAH, YOU'RE A LOT OF RESPONSIBILITY. 580 00:21:16,360 --> 00:21:18,390 YOU'RE LIKE A WALKING BONER KILLER. 581 00:21:18,430 --> 00:21:20,860 - I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH GIRLS. 582 00:21:20,900 --> 00:21:22,830 I PAID THIS CHICK ONE TIME TO TAKE OFF HER TOP. 583 00:21:22,870 --> 00:21:24,500 SHE LET ME JERK OFF IN FRONT OF HER. 584 00:21:24,530 --> 00:21:25,970 I FINISHED RIGHT ON HER FEET. - THAT'S TOO MUCH. 585 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:27,500 - I'M NOT AS COOL AS YOU MIGHT THINK. 586 00:21:27,540 --> 00:21:29,000 - THAT'S TOO MUCH. THAT'S ENOUGH. 587 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:30,670 - LOOK, I NEED HELP, HANK. - YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK? 588 00:21:30,710 --> 00:21:32,480 I THINK YOU'D GET ALONG FAMOUSLY WITH YOUR UNCLE CHARLIE. 589 00:21:32,510 --> 00:21:34,010 - [sighs] LOOK... 590 00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:36,550 I KNOW THIS IS PRETTY MUCH THE LAST THING YOU WANTED 591 00:21:36,580 --> 00:21:37,910 OUT OF LIFE. 592 00:21:37,950 --> 00:21:39,450 I KNOW THERE'S NOTHING CUTE OR CHARMING 593 00:21:39,480 --> 00:21:40,820 ABOUT ME SHOWING UP ON YOUR DOORSTEP. 594 00:21:40,850 --> 00:21:43,050 IT'S JUST READING ABOUT YOU, 595 00:21:43,090 --> 00:21:45,390 YOU SEEMED LIKE A REALLY COOL GUY, 596 00:21:45,420 --> 00:21:49,390 AND I GUESS I JUST WANTED TO GET TO KNOW YOU A LITTLE BIT. 597 00:21:49,430 --> 00:21:50,960 I THOUGHT MAYBE SOME OF YOUR COOL 598 00:21:50,990 --> 00:21:53,830 WOULD RUB OFF ON ME OR SOMETHING. 599 00:21:54,900 --> 00:21:57,430 - YOU WANT TO SEE WHERE I WORK? 600 00:21:57,470 --> 00:22:01,570 - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I'D LOVE TO. 601 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:03,840 THAT'S RIGHT, MOTHERFUCKERS! DIE, PIGS, DIE! 602 00:22:03,870 --> 00:22:06,040 LEAVE IT! LEAVE IT, LEAVE IT, LEAVE IT. 603 00:22:06,070 --> 00:22:09,950 - OH, MY GOD! THEY HAVE A FOOSBALL TABLE HERE. 604 00:22:09,980 --> 00:22:11,580 - HANK, WHAT THE FUCK, MAN? 605 00:22:11,610 --> 00:22:12,850 - WHAT? - WHAT? 606 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:14,150 YOUR DIPSHIT AGENT JUST CALLED ME, 607 00:22:14,180 --> 00:22:15,880 SAID YOU WERE IN A CAR ACCIDENT. 608 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:16,990 - AH, YOU CAN'T LISTEN TO A WORD THAT GUY SAYS. 609 00:22:17,020 --> 00:22:18,720 HE'S MENTALLY ILL. 610 00:22:18,750 --> 00:22:20,390 I JUST KEEP HIM AROUND SO HE DOESN'T BLOW HIS BRAINS OUT. 611 00:22:20,420 --> 00:22:22,430 I AM SORRY FOR GETTING BACK LATE THOUGH. 612 00:22:22,460 --> 00:22:23,930 - THOUGHT MAYBE YOU WENT OUT FOR A PACK OF SMOKES 613 00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:25,630 AND DECIDED TV WASN'T FOR YOU. 614 00:22:25,660 --> 00:22:27,000 - WHAT? 615 00:22:27,030 --> 00:22:29,130 THAT'D BE CRAZY, NOT TO MENTION UNPROFESSIONAL. 616 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,100 I'M HERE, I'M QUEER, GET USED TO IT. 617 00:22:31,130 --> 00:22:33,000 I JUST WANTED TO SHOW THIS YOUNG MAN 618 00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:34,900 WHAT I DO FOR A LIVING. 619 00:22:34,940 --> 00:22:37,410 - OH, IS THIS YOUR KID? - APPARENTLY. 620 00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:40,110 - IS HE-- - ON THE SPECTRUM? 621 00:22:40,140 --> 00:22:42,010 PROBABLY, BUT AREN'T WE ALL? 622 00:22:42,040 --> 00:22:43,680 - DOES HE WANT A JOB? 623 00:22:43,710 --> 00:22:46,010 BECAUSE I JUST PROMOTED THE P.A. TO WRITER'S ASSISTANT. 624 00:22:46,050 --> 00:22:48,620 HE WANTED A REWARD FOR CLEANING UP ALL THAT PUKE. 625 00:22:48,650 --> 00:22:50,890 KIDS TODAY, YOU KNOW, THEY'RE SO FUCKING ENTITLED. 626 00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:52,890 - HEY, HEY, I REMEMBER THIS SHOW. 627 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:54,160 - OH, YEAH, YOU LIKE THAT ONE? 628 00:22:54,190 --> 00:22:55,220 - IT WAS AWFUL. 629 00:22:55,260 --> 00:22:58,130 LIKE, REALLY BAD. LIKE, WHO-WRITES-THAT-SHIT BAD. 630 00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:00,700 JUST TERRIBLE. - I WRITE THAT SHIT. 631 00:23:00,730 --> 00:23:02,160 I CREATED THAT SHOW. 632 00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:04,600 - OH, SORRY. - NO, YOU'RE RIGHT. 633 00:23:04,630 --> 00:23:06,970 THE SHOW SUCKED. IT SUCKED HARD. 634 00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,540 NEVER GOT THE CASTING RIGHT. 635 00:23:08,570 --> 00:23:10,970 MUCH LIKE LIFE, IT'S ALL IN THE FUCKING CASTING. 636 00:23:11,010 --> 00:23:13,810 - HANK? OH, MY GOD! - GET A LOAD OF THIS CUNT. 637 00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:17,050 - HANK, THANK GOD YOU'RE ALIVE. - SHH. 638 00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:19,010 - I GUESS IT WAS JUST A FENDER BENDER AFTER ALL. 639 00:23:19,050 --> 00:23:21,520 - SHUT THE FUCK UP, CHARLIE. SHUT THE FUCK UP. 640 00:23:21,550 --> 00:23:22,820 - WHAT? 641 00:23:22,850 --> 00:23:24,450 OH! LEVON! 642 00:23:24,490 --> 00:23:26,520 HEY, IT'S UNCLE CHARLIE, REMEMBER? 643 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:28,790 IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU... - WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS THING? 644 00:23:28,820 --> 00:23:31,960 - AGAIN. 645 00:23:31,990 --> 00:23:34,100 WILL YOU GET A LOAD OF THAT? 646 00:23:39,570 --> 00:23:41,570 HANK... 647 00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:44,710 I THINK IT'S WORKING. THE LITTLE BLUE PILL WORKED. 648 00:23:44,740 --> 00:23:46,040 I THINK I'M GETTING HARD. 649 00:23:46,070 --> 00:23:47,980 - BEHAVE YOURSELF, YOU ANIMAL. 650 00:23:48,010 --> 00:23:49,680 OH, OH, THAT. 651 00:23:49,710 --> 00:23:51,010 OH, GOOD! GOOD FOR YOU. 652 00:23:51,050 --> 00:23:52,680 GOOD FOR YOU AND YOUR THIN, VEINY DONG. 653 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:54,480 - MY HEART'S BEATING REALLY FAST, HANK. 654 00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:55,920 IT'S KIND OF FREAKING ME OUT. HERE, FEEL. 655 00:23:55,950 --> 00:23:57,190 - NO, I'M NOT GONNA FEEL ANYTHING. 656 00:23:57,220 --> 00:23:58,890 IT'S JUST AN ERECTION. - FEEL IT. FEEL. 657 00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:00,560 - YOU'VE HAD A MILLION OF THEM, AND YOU BOTCHED THEM ALL. 658 00:24:00,590 --> 00:24:02,220 - I'M FEELING VERY DIZZY, HANK. CALL 911. 659 00:24:02,260 --> 00:24:04,230 IT'S A MASSIVE CORONARY EVENT. - NO, IT'S NOT. 660 00:24:04,260 --> 00:24:05,960 - CALL 911. - IT'S NOT. 661 00:24:05,990 --> 00:24:08,800 - CALL 911! IT'S A MASSIVE CORONARY EVENT! 662 00:24:08,830 --> 00:24:10,900 CALL 911! PLEASE! 663 00:24:10,930 --> 00:24:12,500 THIS IS IT, HANK. THIS IS IT. 664 00:24:12,540 --> 00:24:14,700 - NO, IT'S NOT. - WHAT'S WITH THE BONER? 665 00:24:14,740 --> 00:24:16,100 - WHOA! 666 00:24:16,140 --> 00:24:17,910 - SERIOUSLY, HANK, YOU NEED A NEW FUCKING AGENT. 667 00:24:17,940 --> 00:24:20,110 - HE'S MY MANAGER NOW. - ARE YOU OKAY? 668 00:24:20,140 --> 00:24:21,880 IS THERE ANYTHING I COULD DO TO HELP? 669 00:24:21,910 --> 00:24:27,220 - GOD, YOU SMELL GOOD. HA, HA. 670 00:24:27,250 --> 00:24:29,250 - OH! - HOLY SHIT! 671 00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:31,150 DID HE JUST CUM IN HIS PANTS? 672 00:24:31,190 --> 00:24:33,760 - AHH. 673 00:24:33,790 --> 00:24:35,160 - [scoffs] 674 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:43,130 [knocking on door] 675 00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:51,240 - QUIT STALKING ME, LADY. 676 00:24:51,270 --> 00:24:53,680 - LEVON TOLD ME WHERE YOU LIVED. 677 00:24:53,710 --> 00:24:55,040 - OF COURSE HE DID. 678 00:24:56,340 --> 00:24:59,880 - WOW! 679 00:24:59,920 --> 00:25:01,620 HE ALSO TOLD ME WHAT YOU DID FOR HIM. 680 00:25:01,650 --> 00:25:04,120 - OH, YEAH, THAT'S JUST A LOWLY P.A. JOB. 681 00:25:04,150 --> 00:25:06,020 HE'S GONNA BE CLEANING UP A LOT OF PUKE. 682 00:25:06,050 --> 00:25:08,120 - THANKS FOR IGNORING EVERYTHING I SAID. 683 00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:10,290 - THAT'S WHAT I DO. 684 00:25:10,330 --> 00:25:11,960 I'M--NO, I'M SORRY. 685 00:25:11,990 --> 00:25:13,630 - NO, I MEAN IT. THANK YOU. 686 00:25:13,660 --> 00:25:15,160 THANKS. 687 00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:17,800 IT'S GOOD TO SEE HIM SO EXCITED ABOUT SOMETHING. 688 00:25:17,830 --> 00:25:19,770 I'M SORRY ABOUT EARLIER. 689 00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:21,340 MY DEFENSES WERE UP. MOTHER BEAR ISSUES, I GUESS. 690 00:25:21,370 --> 00:25:23,570 - NO, IT'S TOTALLY UNDERSTANDABLE. 691 00:25:23,610 --> 00:25:27,780 THIS IS UNCHARTED TERRITORY FOR BOTH OF US. 692 00:25:27,810 --> 00:25:31,750 MORE FOR ME, 'CAUSE I JUST FOUND OUT THAT I HAVE A CHILD. 693 00:25:31,780 --> 00:25:33,780 YOU'VE KNOWN FOR 20 YEARS. - I'M NOT USED TO 694 00:25:33,820 --> 00:25:38,050 HAVING THE GUY INVOLVED, BUT-- SO DO YOU PLAY GUITAR? 695 00:25:38,090 --> 00:25:40,020 - UH, NOT REALLY. 696 00:25:40,060 --> 00:25:44,890 IT'S MORE LIKE I CALLOUS MYSELF IN THE PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS. 697 00:25:44,930 --> 00:25:48,200 - PLAY SOMETHING. 698 00:25:52,070 --> 00:25:53,600 - I'M TOO SHY, ACTUALLY. 699 00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,870 - I DON'T REMEMBER YOU BEING SHY. 700 00:25:56,910 --> 00:25:57,940 [knocking on door] 701 00:25:57,970 --> 00:26:00,240 - EXCUSE ME. - MM. MM-HMM. 702 00:26:04,810 --> 00:26:07,680 - HEY, HOW WAS THE FIRST DAY? 703 00:26:07,720 --> 00:26:09,220 WHAT? 704 00:26:09,250 --> 00:26:12,020 OH, BABY, WAS IT THAT BAD? 705 00:26:12,050 --> 00:26:14,360 [laughing] WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 706 00:26:14,390 --> 00:26:15,990 TELL ME. 707 00:26:16,020 --> 00:26:17,890 - BABY, THERE'S SOMEONE YOU GOT TO MEET. 708 00:26:17,930 --> 00:26:19,260 - UH-HUH. 709 00:26:24,870 --> 00:26:28,100 OH, NO.